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Problem?

Discussion in 'Groups' started by rocker2, Dec 31, 2012.

  1. rocker2

    rocker2 Ballista Bolt Thrower
    1. PumpkinStars - [Pk#] - Inactive

    Messages:
    256
    Here's a fun game that promotes the use of good grammar:

    Somebody posts a sentence or phrase with a grammatical error. Everybody takes turns guessing what the error is. The first person to guess all of the errors gets to post the next sentence.

    I will start-
     
  2. dandyking7179

    dandyking7179 Bison Rider

    Messages:
    183
    Easy: You're the best friend I've ever had.

    Code:
    You've just listed some amina acids
     
  3. FuzzyBlueBaron

    FuzzyBlueBaron Warm, Caring, Benign, Good and Kind Philanthrope Global Moderator Forum Moderator Donator Tester
    1. The Young Blood Collective - [YB]

    Messages:
    2,508
    Were going to affect some changes in this comeing year.
     
  4. dandyking7179

    dandyking7179 Bison Rider

    Messages:
    183
    Try making more dificult sentences please!
     
  5. ParaLogia

    ParaLogia tired Administrator Global Moderator Forum Moderator Tester Official Server Admin

    Messages:
    1,133
    You missed one!

    I would probably not use "some changes", (maybe a few changes?) but I guess that is a style preference. In addition, "in this coming" seems a bit wordy.

    For the next sentence, use dandyking's:
     
  6. FuzzyBlueBaron

    FuzzyBlueBaron Warm, Caring, Benign, Good and Kind Philanthrope Global Moderator Forum Moderator Donator Tester
    1. The Young Blood Collective - [YB]

    Messages:
    2,508
    Corrected spelling and strenghtened/tightened dandys sentance structure for him; cos passive voice is so passe.

    Haha, yes! Good work Para. :) People often miss the subtleties of effect and affect. And I agree with your analysis of the sentence structure. ;)

    [NB: if you can't tell which of the above paragraphs is intended to continue the game then maybe you should go hand in your reading license.]
     
  7. dandyking7179

    dandyking7179 Bison Rider

    Messages:
    183
    Well then, now that I saw all I the mistakes I made and all the subtleties I missed I shouldn't ask for more difficult sentences :oops:

    Here's a new sentence:
    One of those fury pandas made me eat the food! :eek:
     
  8. FuzzyBlueBaron

    FuzzyBlueBaron Warm, Caring, Benign, Good and Kind Philanthrope Global Moderator Forum Moderator Donator Tester
    1. The Young Blood Collective - [YB]

    Messages:
    2,508
    Close, dandy, but there's still 4 definite mistakes in there; not including questions of usage and structure (or the one you introduced yourself: if the name is normally spelled without a leading capital letter then it should always be spelled that way unless the entire word is being printed in which case it can be all uppercase). ;)

    (Sorry, you asked for something difficult so I kinda went a little overboard :p).

    After someone get's mine we'll use dandy's next one.
     
  9. I'm not sure if I'm being a dick or playing the game properly (or blatantly wrong, for that matter :P), but oh well. ^_^

    I'd try my hand at Fuzzy's last one but it's getting late and I'm oh, so sleepy. Even with a nice sleep I'm not sure whether I could find the mistakes. :3
     
  10. FuzzyBlueBaron

    FuzzyBlueBaron Warm, Caring, Benign, Good and Kind Philanthrope Global Moderator Forum Moderator Donator Tester
    1. The Young Blood Collective - [YB]

    Messages:
    2,508
    You're being a beautiful dick, Beaster. :p <3

    Anyone else willing to give it a shot? :B):
     
  11. Well, I've rearranged some of the words, corrected some spelling and added words where necessary. Some of the 'corrections' might just be due to personal taste. I've probably still missed a couple mistakes and/or added some but I can live with that. :P

    Oh, you. :heart:
     
  12. FuzzyBlueBaron

    FuzzyBlueBaron Warm, Caring, Benign, Good and Kind Philanthrope Global Moderator Forum Moderator Donator Tester
    1. The Young Blood Collective - [YB]

    Messages:
    2,508
    Actually, in essentials you got everything bar one word, which still has 1-2 things wrong with it (I say 1 to 2 because it's hard to tell if you got one of those things right/wrong when the sentence is in quotes--there's your hint, if you wanted one :p).
     
  13. ParaLogia

    ParaLogia tired Administrator Global Moderator Forum Moderator Tester Official Server Admin

    Messages:
    1,133
    I don't understand the hint; I thought the problem was with the semicolon usage...
    (Little fact: I do not know any rules for using ellipses.)
    </br>--- merged: Jan 3, 2013 8:55 PM ---</br>
    Ooh, ooh!
    Should it be "passé"?
    (Doesn't it look a bit weird when I end a question with an italicized word?)
     
  14. FuzzyBlueBaron

    FuzzyBlueBaron Warm, Caring, Benign, Good and Kind Philanthrope Global Moderator Forum Moderator Donator Tester
    1. The Young Blood Collective - [YB]

    Messages:
    2,508
    DING DING DING!

    We have a winner! "Passé" is correct, Para; foreign words/abbreviation not fully assimilated into English (like the Latin i.e.) should retain their correct spelling in the original language as well as being italicised to highlight their not being a part of English proper. ;)

    And yeah, ending a sentence like that looks a little weird, Para.

    Dandy's sentence: (<-- NB: I've capitalised the initial letter of dandy's name because although it should be spelled with a lower case "d" it was also the start of the sentence, and the readability of a sentence [in this case, using sentence case] should always be placed above specific titular peculiarities) (<-- Also, note that I didn't italicise the NB [Latin abbreviation for "note well"] because it's actually a term that's been assimilated by publishers in modern times, and thus can actually be considered a part of English proper. Of course, you can still italicise it if you really wish to, but I feel it looks more natural without the extra emphasis).
    ----

    One of those furry pandas made me eat the food!
    ----

    Para, your turn seeing as you got the final part of the word. :3
     
  15. dandyking7179

    dandyking7179 Bison Rider

    Messages:
    183
  16. rocker2

    rocker2 Ballista Bolt Thrower
    1. PumpkinStars - [Pk#] - Inactive

    Messages:
    256
  17. Impossiburrrr.
     
  18. -Q

    -Q Donator

    Messages:
    153
    I don't think there is anything wrong with the lyrics. Capitalization and apostrophes are used in a consistent manner, and the writer even took the effort to categorize the lyrical sections of the work. They're quite beautiful, really - They really characterize the Jamaican accent in a well-written manner.

    In the spirit of the request, however, I will convert the meaning behind these lyrics into simple English, as if for an audience still learning English A.S.L.


    [CHORUS:]
    Informer.

    You know he'll say who he's going to blame
    Bang, one down.*
    The detective said I stabbed someone down the lane.
    Bang, two down.

    *['licky' refers to a punch, 'boom-boom' refers to a gun, 'down' refers to a death - as compared later in the lyrics]



    [SONG BEGIN:]

    The police came and blew down my door.
    One of them crawled through my window.
    Then they put me in the back of their car, brought me to the station.
    From that point on I reach my destination.
    Well the destination was in downtown - an east detention center.
    Where they whipped down my pants and looked up my bottom.


    [CHORUSx2]


    The bigger they are the more power they think they have.
    They give me a phone and say I have an hour.
    I only want to use it once; to call my lover.
    The lover I'm calling is Tammy.
    I feel my love for her in my heart, down to my belly.
    I tell her I feel cool and deadly.
    Yes, MC Shan and Daddy Snow,
    Together we love them as a tornado.*

    *[Polygamy is Jamaican practice]


    [CHORUSx2]


    Listen to me, you better listen to me now.
    Listen to me, you better listen to me now.
    When I rock the microphone, I rock skillfully.
    Yes, I'm the news.
    When I come in and out of dance they ask, "Where do you come from"?
    People say I come from Jamaica.
    But I was born and raised in Etobicoke* - I want you to know:
    Pure black people, man, that's all the people I know.
    Yeah my shoes were torn up and my toes used to show.
    Where I was born at - Etobicoke.

    *[Etobicoke is a Jamaican ghetto outside of Toronto]


    [CHORUSx2]


    I go with a nice young lady.
    She's intelligent, yes she's gentle and irie.* [irie Jamaican word meaning 'powerful and pleasing']
    Everywhere I go I never leave her at all.
    I roam and dance, man.
    I tour the country, dancing in the nation.
    People never knew I was the boom shakata.*
    I no longer have to sleep in a cardboard box.
    Yes, I'm going to go reach out to the top.

    *[irie is Jamaican word meaning 'powerful and pleasing']
    *[The boom singer in Etobicoke]


    [CHORUSx2]


    Why would he? [repeat]*

    *[Now, he is apparently betrayed by his friend and his life falls into shambles]


    [MC Shan:]

    I'm sitting around relaxing with my girl
    Police knock on my door, punch my friend out.
    They rough me up and I can't do anything.
    I pick up the line when my telephone rings. [This is how they get the connection between MC Shan and Snow]
    They take me to the station, and plant evidence.
    They trail me, because I'm hanging out with Snow.
    What am I going to do? I'm backed up and trapped.
    They smacked me in the face, and took all of my stuff.
    They have no clues and they want to get warmer.
    But I won't turn informer [He won't give up his friend, Snow]

    [CHORUS]

    I now realize there is much more to this song than meets the eye. The story could be novelized well - It documents the tale of a Man's fall from grace, by the betrayal of his own companion - but not quite. Therein lies the dramatic irony. It truly is a wonderful song.
     
  19. FuzzyBlueBaron

    FuzzyBlueBaron Warm, Caring, Benign, Good and Kind Philanthrope Global Moderator Forum Moderator Donator Tester
    1. The Young Blood Collective - [YB]

    Messages:
    2,508
    V. nice, Hats. :)

    Do you have a puzzle for us?