KAG-themed Role Playing Game [Complete]

(Less of the out of character)

 

(when you see a (, it means your out of character, that was nocs 5th post of something, thats why I put it in ()! Just so you know ;))

(Go ahead with the game master idea, i think noc's away for a couple of days or something)

 

(I'VE BEEN ROLEPLAYING FOR 5 YEARS. Sorry caps.)

 

(please stop spamming useless out-of-character messages, will you?)

 

(What have I done aside from be friendly and chatty to people on the forums? I don't want this to turn into a particulary serious thread, as has been the case all too many times when I've RP'ed)

 

SirEndgame: Satisfied with the way the meeting proceeded, I head back to my grotto. Erego has been accepted into the army as a sniper, and I bid him farewell.

I return to my grotto, calculating the amount of ingredients I require. I hear cursing and swearing isnide, as if someone is fumbling around all the random and pointless doodles I forged to resemble enchantments, holy prophecies, and other stuff.

I also hear the clanking of... bones?

Oh no.

I've heard stories of this man from my father... I've seen posters praising him when i was a child in the Red nation.

ULRIC.

 

(I totally agree)
Trae: As i venture towards the fortification, i get a creeping dread that the Reds might have discovered the artifact too. I instantly send couriers to all the people that can help secure this "objective" This is Hella, Endgame, the elven wizard Pagnoux and General Frej.
I arrive first, at the spartan meeting chamber, picked for its anonymity.
Pagnoux arrive first, even though his bones are brittle, he is old even for an elf. He says
"I am sorry, my liege, but i can not travel with you. The travel from the forest to here was taxing, and adventuring in the chasm... Only the most agile can do that, as cracks are numorous, and i will slow you down far too much. I will investigate the artifact, when you bring it to me"
The general arrives afterwards, trying to make me promise favors, for his "great patriotic help". I decline, as patriots would not ask for anything more than to be of service. He sullenly informs me where the temple is located.
It is near. However, there is no easy way to get there, as paths down in the chasm are few and perilous. There is a reason The Bridge is the focal point for defense, as that is the only place an army can cross without getting bogged forever.
A scout arrives, and he estimates it will take six hours from the Castle to the temple, however, with loot from the temple, it might be hard to return before the night starts, even if you set out from dawn. He shudders, as there is some superstition that monsters go out in the night. Another of the myriad of reasons the Bridge is used.

We wait for the rest of the party.

(Sorry for the walls, i get carried away)

 

Time of writing: 3;30 EST
(I wall a lot too... You guys remeber my backstory? :P)

SirEndgame: i skulk through the caves, following the sound sof Ulric's armor. The cursing gets louder and louder.

I get visual above him, standing on an overhang.

I step on a weask-mdium size rock as I get to a better vantage point. the rock break, making noise.

"WIZARD, RELEASE THE ENCHANTMENT!" he roared, seemingly in here for days. I noticed he was looking at a random doodle I mad when I was drunk off of wine last tuesday

I hide and get to a corner cover, where I retrieve a slingshot... and a vial of the Iris Curse (Blind toxin). I aim the vial right at him, and using the sling shot, propelled it through a crevice in his bone-armor. His vision fades instantly, and he shows it.

"WIZARD! RELEASE THIS FOUL ENCHAAANTMENT!" he screams, swining his huge axe around like a lunatic.

I descend down, ready to deal the finishing blow, when he suddenly swings his axe and nicks me on the side. feeling his axe hits me, he does a violent upswing, attempting to gib me in two. I evade, and return to my vantage point where I look for a decoy.

I fumble around in my pockets, and feel- actually, asmell - the perfect thing.

Stale milk.

I throw it down nearby.

"BLASTED WIZARD! YOU WILY LITTLE (REDACTED), HOW DID YOU KNOW I HATED STALE MILK YOU (REDACTED) (REDACTED) (REDAAAACTED)"

He smells it, and fumbles towards it.

I stealthily slide down, and ready my blade.

Blind and distracted by milk, i shove my blade through his stomach, once again through a crevice in his armor.

His lets out a gasp.

my sword holds a sceret: by pressing a button on the hilt, the blade splits into 2 sharp blades.

I press the button, and the blades open, cutting ulric in two.

I see a telltale "+1" above my head as i check his pulse.

Nonexistant.

 

Let me say it this way.
I disagree with killing a person without them having a chance, espescially as you did not read correctly: He was not in your chambers, as he could not find a way in. Therefore, your chain of events is not possible.
Edit: You two sort it out, you are the actors of that part ;D

 

(let's start from here, endgame, can you approach and start from you hearing me swearing inside your chamber etc)
Turns out the Reds have disenchanters in their army, so I waited, in a cold, damp cave for several hours, only to be outshown by a decrepit old man with a face like a bogged weasel. He looked so smug as he walked away after opening the mysterious door it was tempting to smack his pasty weasel face against the wall. Still, I let him go, if I'm lucky he might fall and break his neck.

I headed inside the room, finding the source of the stench of the stale milk. It was stale milk. Mystery solved. But as I looked around, I saw potions, poisons, poisonous potions line the shelves. Others were filled with strange exotic creatures, though a few I recognized, cramped into tiny cages being force fed what smelled like tomatos and dead ferrets. Yes, definitely suspicous. I carried on searching for the best part of an hour, finding scrolls and staffs,and then tripping over them and nearly getting my armour made out of human bones dirty (Personal hygiene, my fatal flaw). And....what's this? Blueprints? Odd, they seem to be for some kind of battering ram, only much bigger than any I've ever seen...let's see...Hot Wax? Catapults? Powder Kegs....my god, this is a Siege Weapon! Larger than any I've seen before.... AH, (redacted) CHAIRS! NEARLY BROKE MY LEG!

 

I said previously that my chambers are inside a long and confusing netowrk of tunnels - he was led to beliving my drunken doodles were enchantments leading in.

Therefore, we were all in the natural grotto at the time, not my chambers.

Though, killing him without a chance is a bit unfair. Shall we take it from the stale milk decoy?

 

SirEndgame: I heard a chair buckling under presuure... and somone cursing. I rush to the door of my chambers, where i see Ulric pouring over my schematics. frustrated, i snuck behind him and slammed his face into my cabinet of sense-dsiabling chemicals.

From tests I conducted on myself, mixing the chemicals causes some of your sense to peridocaclly turn on and off. he got up, apparently blinded, a swung his axe at me swiftly.

I stepped back. A mild cut on my stomach.

he will peridically go blind, deaf, etc, while I have time pressure due to this new wound. dandy.

He blindly swings again. I grab his axe, use it to twist his arm, then kick his stomach while he face twists in pain. He lands on my cot, but soon gets up, damaged.

"ready for more?" i taunted.

"Wha?" he said. he was deaf now.

(Sorry for the delay for this post - chores. next move is yours, ulric.)

 

Ulric: OH GOD! I can't see! I can't hear! I can't move these (redacted) legs properly! *THUMP* NO! The chairs are attacking me! Help me.... MY STOMACH WHO DID THAT..... wow! I can see again! What the? Who's that... he's saying something... I think, I STILL CAN'T (redacted) HEAR! Kill him Kill him Kill him Kill him Yes! See how you like it! RUN AWAY LITTLE COWARD Hah ha! Ulric is triumphant! Ulric the Bloodletter! Ulric the Bloodthirsty! Ulric the... Oh god my stomach *throws up and collapses to the floor*
(Ulric is not the cleverest pencil in the bonfire)

 

SirEndgame: in his random babbling, he began swining his axe like a madman, and manged to throw me across the room. I needed to wrap this up quick... The knockback knocked my sword out of my hand. i staggered, and picked it up.

Ulric was vomiting all over my ornate carpet. That bone-wearing fool. I slashed in, but he tipped back and dodged, and stood up.

I remebered he nearly broke his leg...

I landed a swift kick on his leg, and sure it enough, it buckled in two. While he was howling in pain, I sunk my word in his stomach. and again, and again, and again. Then, into his heart, ending him.

"A clean death is preferable to the torture of one's sense.". hella's words rang in my mind. I gave myself a makeshift bandage, drank one of my vitality vials, and locked his body in an large iron casket. (I hold on to them in case any of my pets passed away.) i was not guility, but he deserved a repsectable burial.

I threw his axe into the rapids, and cast the casket with it.

I watched it go away for about a minute, then gave myself more permanent medical attention.

 

(curses you vile cretin, i appear to have died :( But don't worry, I have a plan... to come back from THE DEAD Mwahaha! Seriously though, I'm coming back, don't you worry.....)

 

(I belive Noc knows more about the permadeath policy then i do. Perhaps you can come back in a later chapter? A month in an RP isn't a a long time :P)

 

(really wanna know what I was thinking?)

 

(...You really didn't have to make another post for that, but i'll bite.

What?)

 

(maybe in a while (you guys do some stuff, kill some things) remember that other artifact you were talking about? Well, the rapids brought my casket to rest near the cavern (or anywhere) where it's located. The mystical power of the artifact effectively resurrects me (somehow) I know it sounds kinda odd, but hey, its a roleplay, the cookie monster could invade next for all we know :p)

 

(I'm back, sorry 'bout that)

Noc: I pace back and forth around my Tactics Set. (A complex game made to teach generals military tactics; similar to chess.) I'm the best in the world, and that's a true accomplishment considering how popular the game is. Well, best except for one, King Arthur. I'm currently hosting a tourney against the only other worthy opponents in the south,

I think. My eyes dart back and forth, analyzing every possible move. I grin and move my phalanx ahead four squares and my cavalry to the left two squares. My opponent takes a minute to think and then falls into my trap by attacking my phalanx with his cavalry.My phalanx gets taken out, but his attack left a gap in his defenses. I move my entire army inward and attack his walls. My defensive Foot-soldiers stood in the way of my cavalry and knights, which chopped away at the wall. I also moved forth my catapult and set up for an attack. He was done for.

I won the tourney, and sent out a messanger with an important message to Valkyrie:

"Find out if King Arthur is dead. When he is, get the army prepared for attack."