Ye Olde Pubb (Last/Previous match general)

Shnitzel

 

I've found the easiest way to get a good K:D is to just man a ballista for all eternity. Bomb bolts can help, but if you're a good shot and remember your trajectories you're actually better off with regular bolts because they use half as much ammo.

 

Nothing suspicious to see here!

 

Spoiler

 

Much legit

 

I calls sandbox bots

 

Translation: He was playing in a pub.

 

I already know.

Maybe I had to mention that before, but no bots were harmed (infact not even spawned).

 

I'm playing on US CTF, match starts. Just fucking around, I make a door wall.

After completing this majesty of style over substance, I'm disconnected from the server. I'm feeling good, eat some bourbon vanilla ice cream and reconnect. Start typing "whatsup people, what did I miss" when i see it... a cold unfeeling stone wall where my beautiful door wall formerly blessed with its presence. I go into a blind rage, kill a few builders below blue base, kill @makmoud98 in the flag door, cop flag, exit through random hole in base wall and cap.

td;dr dont fuck with my door wall

 

Let me explain.

It all started with this weird tower I built:

http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=529459084

The next game, the enemy team did this:

http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=529459097

So, we did this in return:

http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=529459686

Walter's door wall did not last long, and, in his rage, we promptly lost:

http://steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=529459903

 

Bones and I spent the night building giant danguses. Bones was lead designer and i supplied resources and built by bons instruction. With the flag defense in our way, we had to give it a curve.

Spoiler

However, we were too ambitious. Our goals were too big. By the time we were able to build the balls and base, red team were near victory and a griefer was breaking our back wall.

Spoiler

It was a sad day when we lost the glorious dangus. We had to move on and shrink our dreams.

Spoiler

We finally made a complete dangus. launcher and all. Praise the lord

 

I should've stayed, I left after the first dangus was destroyed because it was <=3sad<=3me

 

praise da dangus :DDDD

 

There I was, camping in ballista as always, when I spotted Coroz (at least I think it was him) carrying a keg, ready to jump on trampoline launcher. I made swift calculations in my head in order to shoot that mofo down. Kegs were lit, springs sprung and I shot him right in the face in the middle of the air. But that lousy rat knew about my insane skill! He used shield against my explosive bolt. It just launched him further in the air, above the clouds, towards the sun. Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock... Fuse was burning so he did the only thing he could. He threw the keg down my way. I knew I could do it. I was training for this moment my whole life. As cooldown on my bolt timed out, I had miliseconds left to spare. I shot down the burning keg. Magnificent display of fireworks in the sky was celebration of my victory. Few more tiles and I would be dead. I still had enemy to deal with though. He landed near my vehicle and I could not allow it. I slashed his face until he was dead.

Some say it was the greatest thing they have ever seen. I expect songs to be written about this.

 

I witnessed this marvelous event. It was beautiful!

 

Who uses a wireless keyboard? I've heard horror stories of wireless mice, but wireless keyboards...

 

You monster! I have hard enough time destroying mines with nerfed shield.