[1500] Revolutionary Trap Design

Today, I'm here to tell you about a very special type of trap which, to my knowledge, hasn't been created yet. This, in full honesty, outclasses every other trap you have ever made and will ever make.

You will never need another trap again in your life. Really.

Below is the design that I hope to have adopted into the meta.

Spoiler

As you can see, this employs multiple tactics and has multiple stages. We will go through the tactics in order, and then the stages its victims go through.

• Mindgames: Enemies are distracted by the promise of gluttony and promptly jump into the pit, without thinking of what truly lies beneath the facade.
• String-pulling: After climbing such a massive wall, the enemy must assume there is to be some sort of reward at the top. Naturally, the prospect of food is right there to reward them... and soon disappoint. They assume the reward is true, for it would be a dishonorable act to lie to whatever brave hero may scaled the wall in the first place. Except archers. **** archers.
• Doubt: When preparing to jump into the pit, the thoughts that encompass the minds of the victims usually consist of wonderances such as "Is that really a pit filled with spikes?," "Can I really escape from this lair of reward once I dive into it as could a barracuda in an oil spill?," and "Is this reward of food holding an inner, more malicious intent it wishes not to tell me of, or is there truly a stash of protein hidden within that which its arrow directs to?"

I will now describe the stages that the victims of this trap go through before being murdered viciously.

1. The victim sees what seems to be an impass.
2. The victim climbs the wall.
3. The victim walks right into the trap, because that's obviously what everyone does when they see a pit filled with spikes. (This works 100% of the time. If it doesn't work, it's undoubtedly your fault)
4. The trap works and the builder of the trap receives credit for the kill.
5. The cycle continues indefinitely.

As we all know, traps are a very worthy use of our time and resources due to their consistent nature of killing the enemy in gruesome and unconventional ways that would not be considered legal even when federally administered among many areas of the world. They are absolutely perfect and we will always get more resources out of them than we put in, so it's important that traps come before all else, including walls, items, knights, and archers. The next time you see a wall, remind the builder who built it of the power of traps, and make sure that they promptly begin to construct something resembling the trap shown above. If they don't, hop into the role of a builder yourself and try making your own trap. They never go wrong, and as we know, trap blocks are absolutely useless to the enemy team in every possible way, and they will never work against you.

This trap will cost around 3,750 stone and 500 wood. Most large or massive-size CTF maps have this amount of materials available for both teams, so it shouldn't be a problem to assemble it. If it is a problem, then the fault is none but yours, as you are playing on a server that does not have 3,750 stone and 500 wood available to both teams; and thus, that makes you weak. That also means that every single CTF server and map out there is too weak for a trap of this caliber. It's recommended that you build it on Soprano's sandbox server and then pretend to play CTF if you wish to witness the black magic that keeps the efficiency of this design at its peak.

Remember, traps just become more effective the more complicated they become. Rude Golbderg was hired by the military to create traps, and ended up killing over 9.4 billion enemy troops with his designs. You can do the same in King Arthur's gold, as long as you employ masterful designs like this.

Feel free to suggest improvements, but, as far as I can tell, this design is unbreakable in absolutely every way. You really can't get much better than this.

 

Was about to say stuff about all the wrong you posted, but upon rereading, realized that this is more like a satire of trap making.

 

I guess no one is THAT stupid to follow that rule.
about the trap, this one has been made before, many times, it is mostly seen in vertical form, but i have seen it in horizontal too.

 

r u srs

 

No, no, it's revolutionary! It might have been invented long ago, but that doesn't mean it's still revolutionary.

On a side note, maybe I should add "/s" to the end of the OP.

 

It's one flaw that no one ever seems to take advantage of, is that it can be paved over pretty easily.

It's also quite expensive. For the same cost you could have:

Spoiler

Of course, rearranged in a way to make a forward base though.

 

Lol @ people taking this seriously. It's like A Modest Proposal, KAG-style.

 

About to take it seriously then I just realised it was a joke...

 

I love it. It's revolutionary indeed.

 

*ekhm ekhm*

 

If only trampolines couldn't be turned off by the enemy, or destroyed so easily.

 

I like traps for their looks tho
here's a decorative crucifix

breaking a single back wall collapses everything aside from stone door, causing 10 stone and 45 wood worth of damage
Here, I conceal door within trap, that way it looks like lower knuckle of middle finger instead of a way out
obscene_gesture.png
I went over how to get through platforms in another post, but here's how the blue team exits this trap, in case you're wondering https://youtu.be/8bsF6oUgeHY

making letters out of back wall is sort of cumbersome, though. AFAIK, the signs from tutorial can't be read from afar, so I even if I could build them, I can't use them to taunt enemies over to me