You'll need half a lemon, the tears of an unborn baby unicorn and a can of SPAM. Mix it all together into a meaty paste and use it to bate a mousetrap which you then ring with hummus scented candles at the rise of a new moon.
If you're very _very_ lucky then you'll catch a pixie. You then use a wring all the dust out of them and set your trap for another one. You'll need about 500,000,000 to get enough dust for it to be effective.
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