Clan/KAG Related Fan Fiction Thread

Note: These tactic have a success rate of 99%

 

You forgot the decimal sign in front of the 99%.

 

Recently and mistakenly posted in the POWER clan chat, oops.

If Jinkies can do it, then so can I!

Chapter 1: The beastie.

Spoiler

'Twas once a lad named Frogdo,
To a far away land, he did go,

He arrived in a land of magic,
And before him was a sight so tragic,

For inside a great and mighty tower,
The people of the land did cower,

These folk lived under such horror,
And did beseech this noble explorer,

They begged for mercy and salvation,
For their war torn and desolate nation,

The great and mighty Frogdo did say,
"These atrocities, I cannot belay!"

On wards our hero did march,
Until he reached a gloomy arch,

Within which stood a tower,
Of dark and immense power,

The ever so great Frogdo released a mighty oath,
"Face me! Wicked Demon! For you I do loath!"

The ground cracked with a terrible roar,
The likes of which the dead cannot ignore,

From the spire rose an ever so terrible beast,
Its breath reeked of the recently deceased,

On our savior it fixed it's horrid eyes,
And quickly plotted his demise,

"Ye shan't be spared for such insolence!
None survive the Lord of Pestilence!"

So this foul beast did proclaim,
As it's great limbs did seek to maim,

Our hero did jump into action,
And defied this lord with his reaction,

The sky filled with shards of death,
All were blown aside by its wicked breath.

All hope was lost for this man, ever so noble,
Our savior was rendered cruelly immobile.

Pinned beneath the beasts mighty claws,
Slowly, the demon did pause.

It's wretched breath poured forth as it decreed,
"On your soul! I will feed!"

A sudden warcry arose from a hill yonder,
The source, the beast did not stop to ponder.

"Unhand him ye foul beastie!
I shall interrupt your evil feast-ie!"

Above the crest rose a mighty paladin,
Fresh from the crusades against Saladin,

This knight stood proud and tall,
His name, Jinkies, was known by all,

With a mighty slash and a terrible roar,
This man did charge, leaving a sea of gore,
Through flesh and bone this fiend tore,
Like the ancient gods of yore,
Until this foul beastie, was no more.

 

Tough, poetry you have.

 

Im Not in the story

 

I may make a saga.

 

Well, both Jinkies and I have set off with other players as the basis for our works.

 

My parents had bought me a swing set as a toy on my 8th birthday. After my experience with swing sets, I must say that it is a HORRIBLE toy to buy for any child. It came packaged in a large cardboard box. My father and I spent a few hours constructing it, and I had an enjoyable time doing it. We constructed the swing set and we even painted it a bright firetruck red color that gleamed in the sunlight. We had the swing set face the road, so I could watch the buzzing of cars on the busy highway out in front of us. I was swinging with it for a few hours when I heard something snap. The rope unlatched from the swing set and me, I went with it. Needless to say, I went flying headfirst into busy traffic. The rear end of a pick-up truck was the last thing I saw until it went black. I now lie in a wheelchair with only one functional arm. I blame the swing-set company to this day for obvious reasons.

Parents, NEVER get your child a swing set.

 

I would recommend suing the swing-set company.

 

Chapter 2: For Celestia!

Spoiler

The victorious Knight let out a cheer,
For all the land of ponies to hear,

The noble Frogdo rose from the ground,
And towards this hero he did bound.

To Jinkies he gave a great big hug,
This knight did look ever so smug,

The two warriors stood proud and tall,
This land, they had just saved it all,

Across the war torn land they did travel,
On many a path made of gravel,

At last they reached a stupendous spire,
So tall that no man could go any higher,

Through its pearly gates they did strut,
Alas they did behold Jabba the Hutt,

“Who goes there? Speak or I will make you squirm!”
So spake this ever so humongous wyrm,

“What is this? You foul phoney,
We seek Sarathos! The greatest of ponies!”

So came Frogdo’s blazing retort,
The wyrm replied with nary a thought,

“You seek that pathetic little beast?
Of all the ponies I’ve fought, he was the least!”

The two combatants glared at each other,
Such a gaze would lesser men smother,

In rushed Jinkies, plate armor clinking,
But alas, he charged without thinking,

The foul beast swatted with his tail,
And our fair Knight, this swipe did nail,

The noble Frogdo raised his bow,
With immense power it did glow,

The fiery arrow tore the room asunder,
It launched with a crack of thunder,

Through the wyrms hide this shot did pierce,
The fiend screamed with a roar so fierce,

Such a bellow knocked our savior aside,
Across the shattered floor he did slide,

The sound of hooves on stone came from afar,
Through the gates burst our star,

“Never fear! M’lord is here!”
And so this pony did appear,

With a whirl and a twirl this pony sprang,
His hooves crashed down with a mighty bang,

What followed was an event so vile,
Wretched blood spilt on many a tile,
For this pony had such great guile,
The wyrms corpse this fiend did defile,
And thus he slaughtered, with a wicked smile.

 

Thats sad Darren, I never realized swing sets could be so dangerous :(

 

I approve of frogdos poetry oh so much.

 

I should of written 'Friendship is magic' in somehow.

 

There exists within me a terrible evil... For I possess the heinous power to spam the crap out of this thread, I must restrain myself.

 

Have*, I'm sorry Frogdo. I had to do it XD

 

Well, I'll just have to correct your correction of me.

It should be - I should've written 'Friendship is magic' in somehow.

 

Not necassarily, either is correct. Should have and should've literally have the exact same meaning (as I'm sure you know). Either would be correct although I was convinced that you preferred 2 words. Now it seems evident that you meant should've but I conclude by saying, both corrections happen to be correct.

 

Well, screw it.

I type whatever tickles my fancy, whether or not it's right.

 

Chapter 3 (The Missing President)

Once again another morning, Jinkies awaken's to find Arcade still passed out on the floor muttering crap. Jinkies is still exauhsted so his usually walk will have to wait while he got relieves himself at his computer *WINK*. he reaches his computer bairly turn's it on to find the dust blow out like a cloud storm from the fan. Jinkies thinks to himself when did i last use this blastard contrapition the screen appears with a Glourios Windows 98 loading screen. after it has taken half the day to finally load he can begin his relieving he dashes for google as quickly as possible and types in .................................. MY LITTLE PONIES. He sits for hours amused by the well animated cartoon till the point where he is even posting on my little pony forums while watching the episode saying shit like OMFG did you see episode 3242 was so fucking awesome where they were all like friends and stuff and at the end they stayed friends this went on for the next four weeks -.- . Finally Jinkies has emerged from his pony trance to be a social member of the society he has once again takin his stride down the beach to his favourite sleeze bar where to no suprise ruleral hitting on women but it was not that which atttraceted his attention it was Chrono and Beaster sitting over at one of the corner table's inviting jinkies over. The three friends chat for what seems like hours turns out to only have been Thirty-Five minutes while the whole time beaster is trimming some fucking bonzai tree for no reason but it came time for chrono to go teach his merchandise what happens when they dis obey him so once again Jinkies was left alone to make new friends. Jinkies is drawn in by this mysterious stranger in the opposite cirner in a dark trench coat and shiffty top hat. He approaches the gentleman and sits down with him and asks how are you today sir the man replies oh so your not with them. jinkies is suprised and responds with who good sire and may i know as to whom i am speaking with. They call me Arkadios and those men over at the bar are looking for me so be quiet but jinkies pay's no attention to those words only to shout out hey you threee fella's at the bar is this the guy you looking for he said you were looking for him. Arkadios grabs Jinkies by the collar and rushe him through the back door and away from the men chasing them. Once they are safe Arkadion throw's jinkies up against the wall and shouts WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU RETARD Jinkies murmurs i was only trying to be helpful you said they were looking for you. Do you have any fucking idea as to who I am i'm the last president the one they said went missing well there's a reason for that fuck face it's cause of those assholes you just gave me away to. Jinkies dosent know what to say he is stunned and hungry he builds up the strength to ask Arkadios arrree...eee.e you hungry Arkadios? Arkadios looks directly at Jinkies and begin's to laugh you really are fucking retarded arent you but im starving so you can buy me lunch and start making up for your mass fuck up. Jinkies repsonds i know just the place and its not to far from here. Were here they arrived at The Pitbull Grill and the owner of the estab;ishment just so happens to be called Pitbull jinkies walks inside with Ark now pit and Jinks go way back they exchange the usual greeting of how you been and shit and pitbull ask's im gussing the usaul and the same for your friend Jinkies just puts a big smerk on his face and nod's. two giant bowls of this heavenly god-like food appears Arkadios responds with what the fuck is this after jinkies takes a giant slurp he responds with IT'S RAMEN why you never had ramen before. Arkadious just says what do you think, try it its good Arkadios to his suprise its fucking amazing they both down 10 bowls each easily and stumble out barely being able to walk. Arkadios is like i guess that makes up for your fuck up and Jinkies like well if there is anything else you mention it Arkadios turns around with a giant grin on his face well now that you mention it there is a strip club nearby. They both head there ammediately to Jinkies suprise the place was packed and he thought what are all this poeple doing up past their bed time its almost Four am but to his suprise he see's a familiar face its Ruleral and Jinkies thinks to himself so this is where he goes after he closes the pub but he is pulled out of thought by arkadios he instantly take them over to a shady fellow where they exchange money and leads them to seperate rooms where Jinkies finds a naked women lting on bed saying come here darling. Jinkies goes quiet what seems like a few minutes to Arkadios who is still waiting but then to Ark's suprise The woman lets out a small giggle from what he can hear so he leans his ear up against the door to hear Jinkies talking about my little ponies to the woman who likes to take her clothes off for money but arkadios is pulled away and led into the room next to Jinkies. Jinkies hears load moans and coming from the room next door so he bangs on the wall and says Keep it down in there where trying to talk about Wysteria in here but Arkadios pays not attention. a few hours have passed and both elave the rooms at almost exactly the same time both exchange a glanse a shrug and leave back into the main room where Ruleral has pushed one of the strippers off stage and started singing. Jinkies busrts out into laughter and leaves with Arkadios to go hide out hisw place till Arkadios is ready to leave. They finally arive back at Jinkies estate to find ARcade still passed out on the floor mumbling crap about who knows what Arkadios ask's where is his room and they both retire to their beds for much needed sleep.

 

I enjoyed seeing this. I believe this was chapter 4, keep up the *Cough-good-Cough* work.