Corrupt a wish!

Granted, but then the US goverment passed a law stating that rainbow unicorns were banned. They also captured you and put you in jail where you lost your anal virginity.

I wish for a cup of water.

 

Granted, but you are in a place where the water are not drinkable. You die of cholera.

I wish the US goverment is controled by flying rainbow unicorns.

 

Granted, but then everybody got a boner and the world ran out of men without boners. Then the companies who made drugs for people unable to have an erection went bankrupt and sued us. In the future, a giant baby comes and kills us for making sexual jokes about its mom.

I wish for a cup of clean drinkable water in a clean quality cup that was made by Chuck Norris.

 

Granted, but then he made another wish about flying rainbow unicorns.

I wish that I were a millionaire.

 

Granted, but only in Sims(lol).

I wish that penguins can fly.

 

Granted, but the wings came with a cost. They had to lose weight, so they got rid of their fat. Since their fat was gone, all of them froze to death.

I wish I could go into videos, movies, etc and do things in the movie. I can return to IRL whenever I wanted to. Also, I can't be harmed while inside a movie/vid etc...

 

Granted. However, because the temporal quantum of one cpu cycle is equivalent to the IRL temporal quantum of the amount of time it takes for a photon to travel the planck length (read: very small), time dilation causes you to instantly age to a point of death upon re-entry of reality.
I have no idea what I just said.

I wish what I just said made sense.

 

Granted.But then you made a terrible mistake and ended up blowing your self up.

i wish i had a pet turtle that could shot lasers out of its eyes and protected me every second of everyday.

 

Granted. Promptly, Turtletron becomes self-aware and rewrites his main directive, realizing that to protect you, he needs to protect you from yourself. You become a hostage to his laser eye magnificence every second of everyday.

I wish I possessed the ability to drink water.

 

you wish for

 

Granted.

I wish I had the power of mindcontrol.

 

Granted, but you can only control your own.

I wish I didn't have any sense of humor.

 

Granted but you kill yourself when you are doing well.



I wish i had unlimited bombs.

 

Granted, but game will crash reaching max of bombs.

I wish have a big badass cannon firing muffins.

 

Granted, but they fire with 3000 miles per hour.

I wish I was Asian.

EDIT: Lol superpingwasjustbeforeme...

 

You made my wish! <3
I can maul those damn ponies now, and it won't be brutal.
Anyway, i will have dinner(ponymuffins).

Granted, but you will be turned in Japan into robo-slave.