REKIN - Rekins of Seas: Super Crew of Ultimate Havoking 2: Return of King of KAG: Chapter 420blazeit

>angered our opposition

WE'VE ALREADY WON

 

This will never happen and even if it did it would be unsatisfying and tedious.

Instead, I challenge you to an MS Paint battle of champions. I present to you, Stabby McMurder, the Naga;

Spoiler

Special powers; 1) Claw hands. You think you're safe in armour? Hell no, Stabby's claws can crush dreams and cut through even the most awkward encounters with ease.

2) A slippery as shit tail. This serpentine villain is better lubed than every porn star put together and has only half the STD's. If you think you can grapple with this wiley SOB then you dead wrong, son.

3) Bitchin' abs. Chicks dig it. He's got like a 50 pack of his stronk snake genetics so he's like 10 times as attractive as Brad Pitt in Fight Club. The math doesn't lie, work it for your self, nerd.

I've discussed this in depth with Ej and he agrees Stabby has totally sweet abs.

 

Unable to withstand the pressure of such a conflict without participation, MOLE presents their champion, Hunglar the Grandly Tubular, hedonistic adventurer and slimely slime.

Spoiler

Special powers;
1) I dunno, probably mildly acidic? May cause migraines if ingested.
2) Magically Repulsive Spear of Contemplating Mortality. Stowed handily within a spacious zucchini leather rucksack, handily accessible with even the most rudimentary of grasping implements. Oh.
3) He's got some sick abs somewhere. Several previous owners, with only mild abrasions and frost damage. The eyebrows came as part of the package, because everyone needs a good pair of eyebrows.

If this battle is to go ahead, then we politely request that it take place within oozing distance, and that conventional rules remain in place.

 

I'd just like to take a moment and say that I fully support both REKIN and Stabby with all my little heart. Any and all allegations implying, insinuating or outright stating I have had relations with Hunglar are vile lies, and you shouldn't believe them.

No matter how appealing that slime monster is, I would never, ever, sleep with it again.

 

I'm not sure you understand concepts, my hyperspumatic friend.

 

Well the important thing was we all had fun.