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The KAG laws

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Drok, Dec 23, 2012.

  1. Masery

    Masery is actually Maroon Donator

    The Law of Lumberjack:
    If you're an Archer getting arrows, Builders run to your tree
    If you're a Builder getting wood, Archers run to your tree.
  2. The Law Of Ping:
    -If you have a lower ping than your opponent, he will bitch about his lag.
    -If you have a higher ping than your opponent, he will bitch about your lag.
    -If you have the same ping as your opponent, he will tell you rudely to turn off your hacks.
    Corollary: Get better internet, scrub.

    The Middle Finger Law:
    -If you use the middle finger icon, someone will kill you effortlessly.
    Corollary: And after you die, he will use the middle finger on you.
    -If an enemy uses the middle finger icon, you will try to kill him effortlessly, but you will fail.
    Corollary: And he will smile for a few seconds before going back to the middle finger.
  3. cleggy

    cleggy Arsonist

    The !!! emote law:
    -If you require aid or notice something amiss and use the no.1 emote, you will instantaneously disappear from the visible spectrum within your immediate vicinity.
    Corollary: The moment you start to chat to describe this problem in more detail 3 knights of the opposing team will magically appear.
    Corollary: And they will kill you.
    norill, Lord_bugg, Konoko and 4 others like this.
  4. KnightGabe13

    KnightGabe13 Arsonist

    That idiot was me.
    AL3X_j_M likes this.
  5. vampo

    vampo alchemist Donator Tester

    Miraculacklous Endshame Law
    If somehow against all natural laws beknownst ye world, thou hast crushethed thine enemy swineguzzlers on doth frontlines by way of ye iron price, and thy ticket counts be reduced to betwixt one and negative one, thou shalt be immediately slain by thy pubbiest of foehammers. Not sword, nor arrow. Not bomb, nor crushing. Not headstomp, nor shieldsmash. Hammer-foe wilst be thy demise.
    Corollary: Thyne enemy shalt proceed forth to victory thus after.
    Symphony_Soldier and zollie20 like this.
  6. SouthofHeaven

    SouthofHeaven Shark Slayer

    Kinda hard to understand
  7. Guitarman

    Guitarman Haxor Tester Official Server Admin

    To truly understandeth, one must immerseth thy self in 6theth century England, ma lord.
    KnightGabe13 and vampo like this.
  8. Thiamor

    Thiamor Horde Gibber
    1. Aphelion's Roleplay

    That or when your team gets the flag, they get to a part of their base that is safe, and boast about it, until the enemy breaks through it, rapes them and takes it back along with our flag.

    If the enemy gets it and boasts about it, we cannot break through their base, they rape us and cap the flag.
  9. vampo

    vampo alchemist Donator Tester

    (if ur the only person doing good on ur team, you'll be the first person killed on ur team when tickets get to 0 and it will be done by a hammer and then the enemy will win)
  10. GloriousToast

    GloriousToast Haxor Donator

    another tunneling law
    if you are successful in tunneling to the enemy's base without them knowing and steal their flag chances are, your team is sucking and you have had your own flag taken by force
    corollary: the enemies' team has a admin and uses their powers to hack the game so you somehow lose flag, ending in their victory
    (i know it happened to me before)
    zollie20 likes this.
  11. justi01

    justi01 Haxor

    The Dematerialization Law
    The chances of you randomly respawning increases dramatically with the number of bombs, arrows or resources you're carrying.

    The Low Ticket Law
    If you have 1 ticket left and are waiting to respawn, someone else will take that ticket before you can respawn.
    Corollary: The guy who took that ticket will go afk.
  12. Thiamor

    Thiamor Horde Gibber
    1. Aphelion's Roleplay

    I always thought why not have 'player based' tickets rather than a pool of tickets that everyone uses?
  13. justi01

    justi01 Haxor

    Imagine this: Everyone on your team is dead, while there's only two or three people left with about 10-15 tickets each because thet sat around and minecrafted all round, meaning you have to wait for your enemies to cap the flag. Yeah, that would suck. Also, just so this is more on topic, new law.

    Tactics Law
    Trying to use tactics against someone jab spamming will result in your miserable death.
    Corollary: They will flip you the bird and continue to jab spam until death.
    jeffeypop likes this.
  14. cleggy

    cleggy Arsonist

    The current ticket system helps you to make tactical decisions about whether to push forward or start camping, could you imagine having to look through every single players ticket count just to get a rough idea as to how a team is doing? It would mean every game would end in the actual fighters and front line builders all being dead, and the minecrafters left with 12 lives to kill.
    Ninja'd :QQ:

    The Ninja law
    The length of time and amount of brain power you spend on a post is directly proportional to the probability of being "ninja'd"
  15. spence101

    spence101 Builder Stabber

    If you use admin on a server to help you or the enemy win, all the players will leave.
    If the admin uses powers to hurt you, your team, or the enemy, everyone will laugh and dance and sing and have the best time of their life.
    KnightGabe13 and Masery like this.
  16. Vaine

    Vaine Horde Gibber

    What's sad is that all these rules occur ;-; , hopefully it all changes in scripting build, and there will be many classes, well, on some servers :>
  17. Ninja12

    Ninja12 Bison Rider

    Hm.. my attempt at a law
    The Hard Work Grief/Destroy Law
    Chances are, nowadays, if you spend a lot of time making an amazing tower, or making a great base, a couple minutes later, you will return to your base to see that your enemy is jumping all over the place, ransacking your amazing base/tower.
    Griefer: If you spend a lot of time making a nice, big tower, a griefer will come and blow up the base. And then it all crumbles to your feet.

    The False Kick Law
    You can enjoy your game, have fun, then wait, a griefer comes, and he destroys your tower. You then get false kicked, and you make an argument, and then more people false kick you. You are then banned.

    Y'know, if all these laws happened to everyone at once, this game would be so strange. The griefer gets false kicked, everyone has a ton of resources and stuff, we all die, and yea...KAG would be strange.
  18. Mixim

    Mixim Catapult Fodder

    The truth hurts, but its the truth.
  19. toffie0

    toffie0 is sweeter than you <3 Global Moderator Forum Moderator Tester

    If your admin you'll get shouted at for admin abuse instead
  20. blukey

    blukey Finest Moustache in the Kingdom Donator

    The "ABUS" Law

    If you are admin, the higher the guiltiness of the player you are convicting, the more likely people are to accuse you of abusing.​
    Corrally: The more innocent the player, the more likely people will yell at you to ban him.​
    zollie20 likes this.